Top 5: Most Disappointing Films Of 2022
2022 had its share of exceptional films, but it wasn’t without its own pile of steamy crap as well. We've already shared our favorite films from last year with you, and we’ve even taken the time to hype up some unsung gems, so now it's time to share our picks for the worst.
These are our picks for the five films that disappointed us the most, not a list of the objectively worst. These are films that had us pumped and didn't deliver; films that had better trailers than the finished products; films that promised something and didn't fully deliver... And these are just out of the films we managed to see, so there’s definitely worse fare out there, we just were lucky enough to dodge those bullets.
5: Men
When you compare Men to the rest of Alex Garland’s films, both as a director and a screenwriter, it’s certainly a lackluster offering that leaves much to be desired. From its half-baked concept to its flawed execution and its derivative feel, Men marked somewhat of a fall from grace for Garland, a plummet that stings a bit more following two smash hits. Its slow-burning build gives way to a decently savage albeit extremely repetitive third act, but it never quite reaches a satisfying crescendo or meaningfully coalesces. We honestly weren’t entirely sure what Garland wanted us to take away from its ending, but there were a handful of ways it could have been played that would have either played into the ambiguity or offerred more finality. As it stands now, it’s a thematically murky movie with a fairly obvious message, which you can probably glean from its title. On the plus side, Jessie Buckley and Rory Kinnear are good.
4: BARDO, False Chronicles Of A Handful Of Truths
Following the immense success of Birdman and The Revenant, Alejandro Iñárritu unloaded one of the year’s most tremendously self-indulgent stinkers. Billed as epic black comedy-drama film,” BARDO, False Chronicles Of A Handful Of Truths — a film Iñárritu co-wrote, co-scored, edited, produced, and directed — is the epitome of vanity project. As you can maybe glean from its title, the film is unnecessarily long and and a bit pretentious. There are some truly stunning images and strong performances, but it’s often a chore both to sit through and attempt to make sense of. The visually arresting slog fails to stack up to other filmmakers who turned their personal lives into cinema, like Fellini’s 8 1/2, Truffaut’s 400 Blows, Ingmar Bergman’s Fanny And Alexander, or even Spielberg’s The Fabelmans. As rich as the visuals are, the substance is sorely lacking. The film can be summed up thusly: Terrence Malick, Michel Gondry, and RicharLinklater, but all high on Iñárritu‘s farts.
3: X
Its title might imply it’ll deliver the hardcore action, but in actuality, X only comes packing limp, softcore heat. As a concept, it’s vaguely creepy, but it’s not executed in a way that’s either thrilling or unnerving. It almost plays like a parody/satire of horror, but it never fully commits to crossing that line; as funny as it can be (and as much as it builds itself up to be a feature-length punchline), it’s more concerned with being meta or making a point, than it is making you laugh or feel scared. Although clever and amusing at times, it’s often a cringy, puzzling, and underwhelming horror-going experience. Like Scream, X is a little too preoccupied with trying to impress you with its self-awareness, and if you’re anything like us, it will produce more tedium and frustration than entertainment value.
2: Empire Of Light
What a peculiar, mixed-bag of a film… For starters, how do have Trent Reznor & Atticus Ross make almost an hour of quality music for you, and then you turn around and use very very little of it? That’s grievous mistake number one. The second biggest Achilles heel here is the relationship between Olivia Coleman and Micheal Ward’s character (both of which do a fine job performing). Making it a sexual relationship obscures their friendship to the point of distraction (despite adding minor conflict, it doesn’t really do much). The third issue is it’s labeling of a “love letter to cinema.” Although it takes place in a movie theater, this angle is barely perceptible and totally eclipsed by everything else going on. It’s a good-looking movie — the movie theater location is stunning and Deakins’ cinematography is the usual caliber of awesome — but its story is messy and bumbling. It feels like Sam Mendes — who’s a capable filmmaker — smashed a bunch of topical themes from today into a screenplay and hoped for the best. Unfortunately, he comes up largely empty here.
When actress Olivia Wilde made her directorial debut in 2019 with Booksmart, everyone (including us) went bananas for her and the film. And for good reason, too; Booksmart is a whip-smart comedy that features breakout lead performances from two performers who exhibit incredibly palpable chemistry. Unfortunately, there’s not quite that same aptitude, artistry, or symbiosis on display in Wilde’s absolutely disappointing sophomore feature, Don’t Worry Darling. The film is an amalgam of things we’ve all seen before — and better — all rolled into a boring, bloated, and emotionally unaffecting Black Mirror reject. It’s a little bit Stepford Wives, a little bit Truman Show, a little bit The Matrix, and a little bit Inception, with an incredibly lame Shyamalan-esque twist. In the case of this stinker, the rumors swirling around its contentious production and whether or not Harry Styles actually spit on Chris Pine are vastly more interesting. There’s really nothing to be gained from this empty shell of half-baked ideas and rehashed themes, which is why it’s our pick for the most disappointing film of 2022.
What do you think? We want to know. Share your thoughts and feelings in the comments section below, and as always, remember to viddy well!