Contributor's Corner: Kill, Marry, Screw
During the dawn of Viddy Well, we asked each interested contributor to fill out the same questionnaire. The questions spanned from grave to goofy, but the replies were nearly always unexpected. This week we'll take a look at the following question:
Kill, marry, or screw: Stanley Kubrick, PT Anderson, or Martin Scorsese.
Anthony Cleveland:
Kill: Kubrick. I think he would be the only one okay with dying, since he's already dead. Zombrick, Coming soon!
Marry: Marty. Just to rest my head on his shoulder and listen to him ramble.
Screw: PTA. I guess I would get to say, "Drink that milkshake!" No other reason but that. No homo, of course.
Blake Haughton:
Kill all of them. I live in a different age of directors, so I’ll screw Joss Whedon -- at least a brief season of something good might come out of that. I’ll marry… no one cause I don’t think I could take one directors style for the rest of my life. Oh, yeah, and also, kill JJ Abrams. Because why the fuck not.
Jake Bottiglieri:
Full disclosure, I adore all of them. So in a perfect, mormonism-dominant world, marry all, but where's the fun in that.
Kill: PTA. I wouldn't want to, and I would be guilty for the rest of my life, but I just feel the other two helped shape my idea of what cinema can be in a broader, more all-encompassing sorta way.
Marry: Scorsese. One of the biggest reasons I decided to make film my ultimate pursuit. His influence cannot be understated.
Screw: Kubrick. This would be sweaty and gross, but he seems like such a dynamo of knowledge. Even spending a moment with him would make me feel like I'd learned something through osmosis.
Alex Swartzentruber:
Kill: Scorsese. Because, honestly, I'm not that familiar with his work. Also, I was bored by The Departed. Taxi Driver was boring to me. I'm bored by how serious he is. No sense of humor. I've never seen Goodfellas. I shouldn't be writing about movies, should I?
Marry: Kubrick. I'm in love with him and that's what you are supposed to do to people you are in love with.
Screw: PTA. He's a hit it and quit type of fella. Like, maybe you hit it once or twice -- and you know it'll be good -- but you somehow never text him back, and then like time will pass, and weeks will go by, and you'll be going through the numbers in your phone and you'll be like, "...Ohh, yeah, that guy."
Dave Mcdermand:
Kill: Scorsese. Because fuck that dude.
Marry: Kubrick. Because he would always be working and I would have a lot of free time. Plus, he would really pay attention and remember every little detail. Also, he could tell me about the moon landing.
Screw: PT Anderson. Because he'd be a lil kinky and unpredictable, and I like that sorta thing.
Aaron Haughton:
Kill: Joss Whedon. Just so I can fuck up my brother's plan.
Marry: JJ Abrams. So that my brother's plot ends up being a huge cash cow for my ass.
Screw: Matin Scorsese. He simply isn't getting enough love.
What do you think? Who would you kill, marry, or screw? We want to know. Share your thoughts and feelings in the comments section below, and, as always, remember to viddy well.